martedì 10 giugno 2008

Squeezing the Orange...

Some of you may know that the European Championship is going on. In Italy, as in Spain, Football (or soccer for the americans), is a religion, a faith that goes beyond any sort of rationale. You can kid about Catholicism in Italy, but you've really got to be careful at what you say about football. So, yesterday there was the first game of our National Team, Italy for those who don't know and  I had some friends home. We prepared a great meal.  Together with them, also all the acronyms  were present, LCD TV, HD, PAL. All the elements were there for a really good game. We really prepared the event well. So we all thought we had done our duty. Now it was the time of our Team. We are one of the favorite team to win. We are the WORLD CHAMPION, the idtiot says on TV... WHAT ???????? This doesn't sound good. I am  not prepared for this !! Italy is not prepared for this. We have always won when we were the underdog, we never won when we were the best. This role is not for Italians. We need to be bashed, severely humiliated, we need to know how pitiful we are and then we might win, but being the best ?! No, guys, that's not for us. That's why we have the best moms in the world. That's why we get the hell out of the house at the age of 40 !  This does not sound good at all !
So all the damn journalists started busting our balls on how good we are, saying that everybody fears us and talked about something that happened in 1960something, with celebrations of Rivera, Mazzola. This does not sound good at all...but the adrenaline starts pumping. You should know I generally don't watch a game seated, I just can't. In any event, it's time for history.
 We saw our heros stepping on the field, with the eyes of those who knew they were the World Champions, with the eyes of those who, you can say, know that they can beat anybody. Today it's going to be Holland turn. Sorry guys, you suck, we are the World Champions !
The team started with some idiotic choices (!), which we did not know until the very end.  Just to sum up, AC Milan finished the italian tournament only 5th or sixth, but Donadoni thinks that the midfielders have to be from AC Milan, that one of the key roles in the central defense have to be played by Barzagli, who played for the Palermo football team and has a huge negative record of goals, the right hand side of our defense is given to Panucci, who was known to be NOT in good shape. It really doesn't sound good at all !
Despite all, we start decently, but with some awful misses by our defense ! At some point, Panucci dies, for no clear reason, and it's outside the field close by our goal. The Oranges find a deflection  which ends up behind our Goalie, Buffon, by one of them in clear off-side, unless the referee can consider a guy with his hands on his eyes, laying down in horizontal position on the grass, screaming from pain while dictating his last wills, actively participating to the game. But believe it or not, that's exactly what happens. So we try to recover, but while we do that, six minute later, our defense decides that it's time for a drink and so with a quick run the Dutch are on our side of the pitch. Di Natale, our striker, that is the guy who scores and as a consequence doesn't know how to defend is the only person against one of the Orange, who scores in a breeze ! Game over ! Now we are the underdog again. If that was what we aimed at, well guys, excellent job ! 

ps  there was a third goal by the Oranges, but I leave it to the Chronicles...

 

4 commenti:

stef ha detto...

ciao sergio. hai ragione: telecronisti e vari giornalisti in studio sono dei pessimi. preannuciavano una passeggiata, invece sono dei pirla con le cuffie.
la difesa e' stata atroce: giocavano dei brocchi. ora non ci rimane che vincere contro la romania. almeno i giocatori avranno qualche stimolo...

Sergio Gaudio ha detto...

ciao Ste..abbiamo espresso una mediocrita' disarmante. Speriamo di ricominciare con la Romania..
com'e' il clima EURO2008 da quelle parti ? riesci a vederli ?

stef ha detto...

ciao Sergio. Ora sono in Belgio da Gianni per un altro mese. Quindi non riesco a sfuggire ai vari sfotto'da parte di altri europei. A chi continua a parlarmi del disastro azzurro anche sul lavoro, gli rispondo: "per caso mi vedi preoccupato?" e finisce li'.
ciao e a presto!

Sergio Gaudio ha detto...

ahh... ste, mio fratello e' a bruxelles, se hai voglia, vi metto in contatto cosi se vuoi andare a qualche festa o a cena...fammi sapere